This is a new term, at least I haven’t heard it before.
This phrase combines two popular terms, ‘FriendZone’, and ‘Friends with benefits’.
Let’s analyze these separately, then combine them for a new perspective.
A place, usually assigned to young males, placed there by females who want more male followers than they could care about.
Girls like getting ‘likes’, they always have. They want more attention than they are willing to give.
You see this with movie stars. Starting out, wanna-be stars work hard to generate attention and really interact with new fans.
But as they get used to being worshipped, they become bored, even annoyed with fans. They distance themselves from personal interactions, using social media pretend they care.
FriendZone girls are like that too. They get annoyed with boys who expect as much affection as the boys give.
The girls need their friendzone boys, but they are just minions, you know. males in the FriendZone corral are kind of pathetic really,
that they choose to stay there, in the friendzone, instead of finding someone who would really love them.
Friends with Benefits:
This is where two people maintain a casual sexual relationship without a marital commitment.
Morality apart, this relationship is difficult to maintain, because at least one falls deeper in love than the other, and sometimes, only one person falls in love, which creates its own special misery, especially when the sex creates babies.
This is an even lonlier place than Friendzone. Married FriendZone is when a man and woman are married but usually the man is still left out in the cold. A lot of married men know what I mean. Is there any need to elaborate any farther?
One old woman I knew (now dead) said, “Marriage is the price men pay for sex and sex is the price women pay for marriage.”
While this shouldn’t be, and a woman shouldn’t burden a man with herself if she has zero sex drive,
the man’s drive is usually strong than the wife’s , so I can see how this saying was birthed.
Anyway, women are getting deceived into the proposition I call ‘FriendZone-with Benefits’.
Almost a wife, but not quite. These women used to be called 'mistresses’.
The man wants her body on a regular basis, wants her to be loyal to him, is willing to benefit from her employment, but doesn’t love her enough to marry her.
And how does she push him over the edge, to get him to the altar? He is already getting her body and whatever money she has. What more is there?
Does she hope he will get so familiar with her that he will wake up one morning, suddenly terrified of losing her?
I know of a woman who lived with a man for over 10 years. She started to age. He met a new girl, went off and married her shortly thereafter.
The original girl was alone and threw away several years of her life. She had wanted to marry him.
Note: according to: https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/11/06/key-findings-on-marriage-and-cohabitation-in-the-u-s/
"Point 4: Of the people who were NOT engaged when they began cohabiting, only 44% of them saw cohabiting as a step toward matrimony."
Like boys in the FriendZone Corral, the women willing to live in the 'FriendZone-with-Benefits Sorority', they seem kind of needy.
The old excuse of parental divorce as an reason for avoiding marriage, while valid on one level, is invalidated when cohabitation is initiated.
If a person is too scared to marry someone, he should be too scared to create a mailing address with her.
Cohabitation has a poor track record for progression into marriage. and often leaves people less able to function competently, once the relationship is over.
So, what about girls who refuse to marry and are the instigator of a FriendZone-with-Benefits?
It’s the same kind of pain for the underloved man. Sex outside of marriage always has victims, even with ‘consenting’ adults.
Eric J. Rose